Oh, I love love. As a pigeon toed kindergartener I chased the boys I liked at recess giggling as my braided pigtails bopped around. In middle school I remember writing about my crushes in my diary with fervor. I was so certain my love story was destined to be a tale of unrequited love forever. By high school I had “serious” boyfriends. I wanted so badly to be the girl who made it work with her high school sweetheart to avoid all that loneliness and heart break and skip ahead to the happily ever after I was certain existed. I can see now why that fantasy falling through was definitely for the best. Oh the nativity of youth (:
If my life were a book I am confident it would be a romantic comedy, not the romantic comedy starring Reese Witherspoon or anyone else equally flawless but a quirky rom com filled with mortifying moments even viewers find themselves blushing throughout. In honor of Valentine’s Day I decided to share a few “love confessions” but as I had two different interpretations of what “love confessions” means to me I decided to break the post into two parts. I have plenty of embarrassing love stories and today I want to share a few of my favorite blunders.
- In 7th grade my first boyfriend and I would talk on the phone every day after school but were both too painfully shy to speak to each other in person at school. On a month long trip to Maryland over the summer I bought him a Spitfire sweatshirt as a souvenir (I thought this was the epitome of skater life). Though the sweatshirt was brand new and untouched by the object of my affection I romanticized the piece as if my boyfriend had given me his sweatshirt to remember him by…and wore the sweatshirt constantly. When the day finally came for me to present him with his gift he pulled on the sweatshirt reached into the pocket and found…a rice krispy treat wrapper. Nothing like the wrapper of a sticky treat to say “I missed you”.
- My sophomore year of high school I had a huge crush on a dread headed junior with big green eyes named Philip. Since the two of us had never spoken I tried everything short of voodoo magic (and er…talking to him myself) to get his attention. I made a point of walking past him in the cafeteria multiple times every lunch break, I made eye contact across the room before exploding into giggles and running to the bathroom with my friends, informed all of his friends through my friends that I had a crush on him and compiled a collection of photographs of him from the newspaper, yearbook, and our church youth group office…after that I left our relationship to fate (; The art of subtlety or playing it cool was completely lost on me. We finally did go on a date at a carnival in our small town that ended with a sweet kiss on my doorstep at the end of the night. Though I was out past my 10:00 curfew even my parents didn’t have the heart to punish me as I was absolutely glowing. We went on to date for roughly four years despite the awkward (and admittedly creepy) stalking on my part that ignited our relationship. Though I’ve moved on and I’m very in love, I still remember the night of our first date fondly as one of the sweetest moments of my life.
- After going through a pretty traumatic break up I did as so many singles do and signed up for Tinder. I started talking to a “nice” guy who went to college with one of my friends. Since I often went out with her near her school I mentioned to him that we would be out. He asked if he could meet up with us at some point in the night and of course I excitedly agreed. Fast forward a couple hours and I’m dancing at a bar with my girls when I run into hmm…let’s call her “Sarah”. Sarah and I had “dated” the same guy a few years earlier (truthfully I never dated him I just obsessed over him). Ever since Sarah and I had cheerfully attempted to be friendly with one another. As I danced and chatted with her she asked who I was texting. “Oh no one, just this guy I’m supposed to meet here later” at which point she asked to see his photo. Her face turned cold and her voice quickly changed from friendly to hostile. Turns out the guy who had been texting me from Tinder was her boyfriend. We awkwardly parted ways and I assumed the our interactions were over (and clearly decided to no longer pursue the guy). Well, when he showed up she dragged him over to me and forced him to introduce himself. He acted like he had no idea what she was talking about and I just about died being part of their couples spat.
- Out with a guy I recently had started dating we stopped for pizza after a night out dancing. Low and behold a complete stranger called my name, unsure who he was I assumed he was someone I had met at a college party and forgotten. As it turned out we hadn’t met at all but rather he recognized me from Tinder and he thought he was calling me out as a cheater in front of my long time boyfriend. His assumption couldn’t have been further from the truth as the guy I was with had met me on Tinder too. I wasn’t in the wrong but I sure felt embarrassed (I captured the story in its entirety here).
I was really trying to keep these stories brief but realized a little back story is necessary to see the humor in most of these situations. Though several of my relationships have started with a little harmless stalking on my end I like to think my awkward dating habits were endearing in their own way (let’s not forget all grand romantic gestures seem creepy if they aren’t well received and likewise all well received obsessiveness can be seen as creepy). Luckily I was cute and mentally stable enough that no one was seriously concerned with my approach to dating. I love the awkwardness that accompanies dating, if we don’t have awkward stories to laugh at ourselves what is the point of life anyhow?
Please please share any of your favorite embarrassing dating moments or awkward stories! One you own your embarrassing moments no one can use them against you (right?)