Just days shy of my 21st birthday I published my first blog post, a recap of my year. I was just a couple months into a big transition. I had transferred universities, moved to a new city and was living with a boyfriend for the first time. My life was new and exciting but I felt isolated and lonely. I was optimistic on the outside but second guessing all of my decisions pretty hardcore on the inside.
I had the intention of being the next College Prepster though my style was not naturally preppy in the slightest. Needless to say I fumbled trying to find my own blogging voice for awhile there. All the blogs I read were based on the East coast or in the South so it really seemed as if all bloggers were meant to collect Lilly and J.Crew like maniacs. Later I came to understand the idea of regional style and though I still own pieces from both Lilly and J.Crew I have to say a hot pink dress covered in sea horses and lemons looks pretty ridiculous over here in Seattle (not that that ever stopped me). Four years have passed since my first blog post and I can’t help but feel that four years seems like an impossibly long time.
Eventually I reached a space that was comfortable for me. I was able to write candidly and build genuine connections with people I had never met. For someone who is as socially awkward and as bad at building connections in a crowded room as I am blogging was life changing. I learned to emote freely and bleed my introspections onto the page. Blogging has helped guide me through some serious rough patches and come out stronger and wiser on the other side. I will forever claim blogging has been the most therapeutic exercise I’ve ever adopted (topping even actual therapy).
Now that I’ve been blogging for four years (what?! How did that happen?) it’s interesting to look back and recall how my blog has changed over time. I’ve definitely gone through phases over the years. There were moments when I thought I wanted to be a fashion blogger or a full time blogger. I put more or less emphasis into marketing my blog, more or less emphasis into SEO, blogging groups or advertising. I can’t say 100% how I’ll feel about blogging or what my strategy will be a year from today but for now I’ve once again settled into a blogging style that works for me.
I like writing about feelings and random introspections than about blogging itself or fashion trends or beauty tips (good thing too because I am just not good at makeup). I like sharing outfits from time to time but I certainly don’t expect anyone to rush out and copy my style because I have some serious misses along with the “hits”. I still hate mentioning my blog in real life, and self promoting makes me incredibly uncomfortable. I like writing the fiery posts that have my heart racing and fingers tapping violently against the keyboard. I like sharing the intimate longings of my heart but I also don’t mind drooling over all the shoes I’d like to fill my apartment with.
Over the next year I really don’t have any big goals for my blog. I’m so grateful for those of you who have chosen to follow along and especially to anyone that has stuck around over the years. There isn’t a single day that goes by that I am not thankful for this creative outlet and supportive community, but my goal is no longer to be a blogger girl boss, it’s just to write. I mean no disrespect to all of the women who have taken their blogs and built a real brand, I think that sort of blogging is awesome too, but I’ve found that for me, aiming to turn something that is essentially a diary into a mini business takes the joy out of it for me. So my one wish for the next year of blogging is to blog candidly, to blog with my heart whatever that means. I want to write in a way that is emotive and open and raw and I want to throw some cute dresses and shoes in there every so often alright?!
With that, it’s time for me to cease my nostalgic ramblings, at least for today. Eskimo kisses and champagne toasts to everyone who has been a blogging friend to me over the years. Blogging has changed me for the better and I am eternally grateful! Have a great weekend lovelies!