I have never believed in zodiac, as a kid I was actually afraid God would send down fiery lightning and strike me if I read my horoscope too often, but I’ve since realized any divine deity probably could care less if I read the back pages of Cosmo when I’m bored (who would have thought?). Actually, the early Christian church practiced horoscopes quite regularly, it wasn’t until post Galilean times that the church began to disown the idea of the zodiac and any stellar persuasion in daily life (oops, my history nerd is showing). Despite my overall disbelief in horoscopes, I’m still quite fascinated by them, and find myself attracted to their cosmic allure every so often.
I’m a Capricorn, which, after doing a little research, I really couldn’t be anything but a Capricorn. Capricorns are characterized as hard working, ambitious, responsible and fair, all good qualities right? Well…they’re also characterized as stubborn, introverted, lonely at heart and conceited. Eek…does laying on my bedroom floor listening to sad Taylor Swift songs on repeat while copying my favorite lyrics in a notebook as if they were scripture make me introverted or simply crazy?! As a teenager I absolutely hated being a Capricorn, let’s be honest, the Capricorn horoscopes at the end of Cosmo are THE WORST. While all of my Libra and Aquarius friends were guranteed to find love, romance and cute new shoes in their future, I was promised that my hard work would pay off slowly but surely. Shockingly, I thought it was the most boring sign under the sun (are the zodiac under the sun…I don’t really know) and I longed for a less uptight and more bubbly sign like Leo. In Legally Blonde (what else?!) Elle Woods was surely a Leo, Vivian Kensington seemed like a frigid stuck up Capricorn. Imagine the HORROR of classifying yourself with that prude b-word. The mere fact that I ever even allowed my zodiac sign to give me anxiety further proves my innate Capricorn qualities.
As I’ve come to accept (and balance!) who I innately am with becoming the person I want to be (it really is a balance between accepting who you truly are BUT constantly pushing yourself to become even better), I’ve realized a lot of my characteristics are pretty seagoat like (and hey, a seagoat is pretty darn close to a mermaid). I AM ambitious. I go stir crazy without a checklist, and I need to feel productive to feel fulfilled. I am primarily introverted despite my desire for strong friendships and relationships. I would much rather spend the evening with one or two friends than in a huge group, in fact, large groups give me major anxiety. It is difficult for me to become close to people, I put up walls and push people away. However, once I am close to someone I basically refuse to let them go, I thrive off of the “vulnerability high” that comes from deeply emotional relationships (and yes, I made up the term “vulnerability high”).
There’s no denying it, whether I believe in the zodiac nonsense or not, I fit the description.
While researching Capricorn qualities (via the most valuable research tool…google, duh), I found a website describing “What it’s like to date a Capricorn woman”. The short answer “The Capricorn woman is perfect for a man who likes a challenge”. The universe got that one right! Apparently I’m dominating and controlling in a relationship (I’m not though Jeff, right?! RIGHT?!) but I mean, in a positive way of course. The article also suggested my “lover” (Oh God, I seriously hate that word) shower me with gifts to show me affection. I guess I’ll take “controlling” and “challenging” if I’m showered with gifts in return…fair enough!
I’ve learned to love being a “Capricorn”. You still won’t find me checking my horoscope each morning, but I’ve started to recognize the sign as a symbol for some of the qualities I pride myself on, whether they were written in the stars, my genes, or as a result of my values&choices. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you feel that it depicts you accurately?